Saturday, February 19, 2005
Practice makes perfectWhoah, guess i haven't blogged in a long while.So darn busy these days that the the first thing i do when i get home is plop down on my bed and sleep. the past week, all i've been doing is attend practices here and there. I'm even scared to go out of the classroom,coz i'm sure that within a few minutes, one of the people from the groups i'm with are gonna find me somehow and say, "uy,practice mamaya ah?" and i give em my usual nod and "sige,sige" and sometimes without even thinking that there's also another practice with another group at that time. Heck, even staying IN the classroom is trouble, as i sit right next to Chua who tells me that we're gonna do all sorts of these nice songs tapos yun pala he hasn't even told the guitarists an so we cant play it. Sure, i didn't mind at all at first, its fun to be part of these things, but last thursday and friday i just couldn't take it anymore. Me, jas, karla, sugi and hazel were excused from class to practice for the formal dinner which is on feb 22 and 24. Parents,students and alumni are gonna be there, including some of the very big and famous people who used to study there. Anyway, we're all pressured kasi daw the other branches of OB ahd a really succesfull formal dinner, and of course, being the main branch we have to do better. The theme of the show for the dinner is everything that the alumni have done in the past, their big shows like
headin' for broadway, fairy tales come true and
ang galing ng pinoy. Friday was the general rehearsal, and they just fixed our skit (jasmine and aladdin) the night before. Well,ok lang. but i wish they'd send us home already if they knew that they were'nt gonna be able to work on our part. ;p Ok, so yesterday was dress rehearsal as well, and i provided the costumes for the poor cinderella, annie, and sandy in grease. I thought mine would be taken care of by the school na. But when we go to the costume and props room, i see this sparkly, sequins-y, blue BRA with dangling beads and a blue gypsyish skirt on a hanger and they tell me that THAT's Jasmine's costume. YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING!!!! and they wanted me to wear that without any flesh colored thingy inside. no freakin' way,man. After incesantly telling them that i HAVE to wear something inside at least, they finally gave it to me. And thats not all, it comes with finishing touches. there are these 2 sparkly arm bands, an equally sequinsy blue thingamajig that you wrap around your waste that makes you look like a belly dancer, and best of all, a band that you put on your head, that kinda looks like princess jasmine's crown except that instead of a stone in the middle, there's a big sparkly "J". Lovely,isn't it?
We had a tiring run through and rehearsal from 8:30 to 1, tapos rewind was supposed to perform pa at la dolce at 1. Gaaaaaaah!!!! luckily, babz was understanding enough to see that we were so exhausted and told the teacher na next week nalang kami magpe-perform. haay. thank you babz. We had an hour break,then at 2 to 6, practice again. Towards the end, mrs. ciricaco was loosing her head again and kept yelling and swearing at us through the microphone pa, and then the teachers started arguing about our performance sa assembly. geez, why do you guys have to make it so complicated? just dont make us perform for the assembly then! Anyways, after that, jasper tells us they want to practice pa after 6. ohmygaaaaaad. Sorry, but this time we just had to say no. "Bahala nalang tayo sa prom" he says, and i dont know if he meant that sarcastically. Well, yeah...bahala na sa prom. too tired to care.
PromSpeaking of which, the prom is in 6 hours. I finally got my dress last night...it's ok, much better than last year's at least! Hmm, im not that excited. I just like the getting ready part (haha, such a girl) but then im sure it wont be as much fun as i want it to be. Heck, my date's even more excited than i am! Sometimes he's more girly than me and jas,hahaha. (keedeeng arvs!) Sigh, daya kasi, my friends are sleeping over at edsa shang after the prom, and i'm the only one out of my closest friends who wasn't allowed to go. POOP. I know my mom's reasons, and its not really because of that "no sleepovers as long as your a girl in this family" which has been a rule for 3 generations already. But....it's my last year!!!!!! :'( sigh...... this is one of the things i hate most, i'm always not able to go to these sorts of things, either coz of transpo or coz its a sleepover, its too far,etc.. i've missed a whole LOT of these during my high school life. SUCKS.
oh well, i gotta go now... tell you how it goes soon.
tricia grew up
at 11:21 AM
Sunday, February 13, 2005
i am
SUCH an
idiot.words cannot describe how much i wanna just spontaneously combust right now.
lsgh fair yesterday. One of the worst days ever.Not coz of the fair, but what happened in it. I am such an idiot and the biggest plague that ever lived. It'd be better if i just rotted at home. I dont wanna face anyone anymore, not any of my friends, not anyone at all. Someone just shoot me. Gaaaah, i feel like total crap. When we got there palang, everything was ba na. I was so upset i that i made a slight scene in the far depths of the parking lot, although the only other person who saw it was the guard. He probably thought i was the most dramatic person ever. I probably was. My being upset had nothing to do with the fact that we didn't have tickets, although we didnt. We still were able to get in though, but being there made it worse, i probably should've never wanted to go in the first place. Maybe my curse for not being able to go to fairs had a purpose after all. I ruined everything. I'm such a horrible person. Being upset just makes you totally lose your head that you cant think straight anymore, and lose all sanity. I hate myself more than ever right now. There are just so many "if-onlies" going through my head. We all could've enjoyed it better, if only. if only i didn't exist. If only i knew what i was thinking. if only i wasn't so short tempered and uber sensitive. If only this were all a dream.
I hate myself with a
passion right now.
tricia grew up
at 1:02 AM
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Ok. Not like the days are getting that much better, but lets just say it could be worse. Thank God i still have my bestbud. :( hahaha, lets start off with friday. This was when our band[hahaha] was gonna perform for the first time at la dolce. We performed during the lunch break of the freshmen and sophies, buti nalang,coz we weren't at all prepared! Chewy was absent most of the week so we only practiced a few hours before the thing itself. We only decided to do 3 songs muna: same ground and huwag na huwag by kitchie, and then torete. Jimminy christmas. the only thing that sounded matino was torete. Me and haze realized that kitchie's songs are nice to listen to, but are not to be performed by the likes of us.No sir,never again. Sabooooog!! gaaaah, i wanted to jump off the 6th floor after we performed.Eeeek.
Saturday, we had training for CAT at camp crame.MAJOR tanning done! You could see major tan marks on everyone's foreheads and arms. Oooh, but i got to be the platoon leader! The one assigned to us was absent, so an officer told me to take charge. yes naman.... after a while though, i got scared kasi di ko alam yung ibang commands, so i told hazel to take my place, and i became platoon sergeant nalang!:) it was fun, me and haze kept snickering as we marched, laughing at our stupid mistakes. haha, it was fun, i still got to give some of the commands, and was reffered to as "ma'am" by one of my batchmates! hihihihi... after CAT, me and my sis went straight to laguna. First to the dentist,(yes our dentist is in laguna) then to the factory na. My dad had this special dinner for some of his employees and he wanted me and my sis to sing a couple of songs for them and help entertain them. It went ok naman, and for the first time, he gave us a talent fee na!hahaha...500 bucks each,not bad for like, mga 4 songs lang,hehe. I missed sila tita irene,my dad and angie, so i had fun din naman in Laguna. It was such a nice day out, and the breeze there's still chilly! Perfect chance to just unwind.
Last week, finally had a prom gown made! I originally had one made na a month before, but then 2 weeks later, the girl said her laborers weren't gonna come anymore. Thank goodness we found someone capable of finishing a gown in 2 weeks. Gosh, hope it turns out ok, my gown last year was a disaster! eeeew. hmm... as i passed by the 4th year classrooms on the 4th floor or the "siyudad", i noticed that all of them had a daily countdown of the number of days left till graduation. note: 28. We must be the only class that doesn't count it down daily, all we know is that it's 30 something days, or 5 weeks, something like that. I realized that i'm not the only one who's not feeling the....well,i guess "spirit of graduation". My whole class seems to be ignoring the fact, or it's just not sinking in.Plus most of us just cant wait to get out. Ungrateful pricks? not really, it just doesnt seem to wanna sink in! and we've become bitter to a lot of the teachers na, i guess 4th year just wasn't our year. Ever since the first quarter, its all been so monotonous. We've never really looked forward to any subject or class, unlike last year when we'd have the best time pag CHEMISTRY.As in we loved chem,we loved our teachers. arrrrrrrrh. sad,sad,sad... especially coz i wanna make the most out of the 28 days we have left.
Today was so frustrating. I was supposed to watch a movie with joanne and jas at theater mall after dismissal, so i use kaye's phone and text my mom. She replied, "why, dont you have class?" and i already had a feeling she wouldnt let me. 5 o'clock came and she didnt reply anymore, so i assumed she didnt let me go. Haaaay. So while jas and joee watched a very long engagement, the plague was left alone and went to kameraworld to have some pics recopied nalang. at 6, i went back to school to wait for my driver. I was sitting outside on the benches with claud,jiggy,bernice,icey,kevin,emil, and others. one by one, they all started to leave, so kaming dalawa nalang ni emil dun. 6:30, and my driver wasn't there yet. So nag-bonding muna kami ni Emil, he made kwento bowt some stuffm,hahaha. 7, and still no sign of my driver. Some of the seniors passing by were already starting to get intrigued by the 2 of us sitting alone outside in the dark. (wahaha,naman...) so fine, we sneaked back into school( you aren't allowed to go back in once you've gone out) pasaway,hahaha. Finally, it sunk into me that maybe my mom DID allow me to watch the movie, and told my driver to pick me up at 7:30! sure enough, when i walked into school, kaye yelled out from the court,
Patis! your mom texted, 7:30 ka raw susunduin! oooohhh great. Haay nako. So fine, i just wait for my driver to come fetch me nalang. I told Emil a while ago na if 30 mins go by and wala pa rin, gagapang na ako pauwi. Eh it was already 8,and wala pa rin! and then he brought it to my attention na baka nasa theater mall. Oh fudge. yeah,that makes sense. Stupid Triciaaaa!!!!! So on the way to theater mall, i see joee and jas, who've just come out of the movue. They frantically tell me that they just saw my driver but told him that i probably walked home na. Aaaaahhhhh!!!!! 2 hours just idley sitting around!! I was so frustrated na coz i really wanted to see that movie, and was starving and tired. plus my mom would kill me. Haay, my lifesaver of a bestbud came to the rescue and brought the sulky plague home. *thanks bestbud* :(
Humans never seem to have an ending to all their wants. You are never satisfied with what you have, and its always "i want this, i wish i had that, if only i was like this..." yatiyatiya.You keep wanting more than what you have, searching high and low, going to the depths of the earth just searching for answers. Finally, you realize that the one thing you've been searching for was sitting right under your nose the entire time...... nearly rotting
just waiting for you to notice it. Some people are patient enough to wait for the ones they love to realize this, yet others often get restless. What if you let that one get away simply because of your selfishness and blindness? You keep thinking,
there's gotta be more, but what if that was it? Some people complain about how lonely they are,that they'll never find it, but sometimes they're just too blind to see what's already right in front of them.
Not all people are martyrs, they wont wait forever.
I'm such a doormat. Plus i tend to have too much faith in people, blindly believing that they're too nice to do certain things.People already warn me, but do i listen? NOPE. i'm so stupid. It would be better if it just left me alone. i was doing fine na,so peaceful and all. And then. Now i'm all flummoxed. Hate it. I am a plague.
tricia grew up
at 9:43 PM
